Perfect Affordable Modest Dresses for Everyday or Evening Play

Finding fitted long-sleeve chic modest and affordable dresses that can be worn for everyday or evening play seems like mission impossible.  Then along came Boden.  Personally, I never heard of this UK clothing store until I mysteriously got on their mailing list and recently received their Winter 2012 catalogue.  I was pleasantly surprised!  Whether you're looking for the perfect little black (modest) dress or fashionable long-sleeve dresses that can be worn to work or for play, Boden's got a great selection of styles at reasonable prices.  Catch their sale at http://www.bodenusa.com/

Here are some favorite modest chic dresses (all of which are currently on sale at BodenUSA.com):

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Under the Chuppah: A Bride’s Prayers

The preparation prior to the day of your wedding includes so many minor details it is easy to forget the big picture – you are getting married! The day of your wedding should be one of celebrating the unification between you and your soul mate, not one of stressing about trivial things that may not go as planned on your wedding day. That being said, I believe one of the essential ways to tap into the spiritual side of your wedding day and embrace getting married is Under the Chuppah. 

Walking around your husband-to-be seven times is an important opportunity to give blessings and say prayers that seal a stronger bond between you, your chosson and Hashem. Out of all of the details you may want to think about on your wedding day, embrace the time you spend under the chuppah walking around seven times and praying to Hashem. Your prayers are personal and there are many thoughts that may come to your mind. I thought of what I wanted to say ahead of time, printed it out and brought it with me under my chuppah, which turned out to be very handy. I also wrote a list of names to say when praying for others. 

This is a personal thing to each bride, but here is an outline of some essentials based on A Bride’s Prayer for Sepharadim and Askenazim Jewish Women by Rabbi Michael Haber: 

The Perfect Wedding Photographer

A picture can say a thousand words, and what better day to capture precious moments than on your wedding day.  Finding the perfect wedding photographer at a reasonable price can be challenging, especially if you want the photographer to be knowledgeable about Jewish wedding customs and details that tell your Jewish Wedding story.  Of course, going with top photography vendors that have won awards may be a great way to feel comfortable with a photographer’s reputation.  Wedding Wire has their list of top photographers given the Bride's ChoiceAward for 2012. 

My fiance had the heavy responsibility of choosing our wedding photographer mainly because this falls under Groom’s expenses (see my blog about FLOP), and his top criteria for selection was budget (as in, the cheaper the better).  The good news (for me!) was that the photographer he chose happened to be an award-winning photojournalist, having won First Prize in the World Press Photo competition and nomination for the Pulitzer Prize.  My fiance did not know this at the time but he had seen some recent wedding photographs taken by Gulnara of our friend’s wedding and also knew the price may be negotiable. 

 Factors that impact Pricing and Negotiations:

• Number of Hours for the Day:  Depending on the photographer and the package, they may charge extra if the number of hours expected to take photographs goes beyond a limit.
• Travel Time and Travel Expenses:  A longer commute for the photographer could mean a higher price tag for you, so be sure to think about where the photographer is traveling from to get to your wedding site.
• Number of Locations:  Maybe you want a backdrop of Times Square, a yellow cab, a bridge in Central Park, or The Pop Art Love Sculpture by Robert Indiana located on Sixth Avenue in NYC.  The more places to travel and sites to shoot will increase costs.   
• Number of Photographers:  The number of photographers needed to cover all of the details throughout the day could get pricey, so you may want to be more selective on when it is most necessary to have additional photographers on site.
• Defining the “Package”:  Typically, photographers will provide different Package options that can impact costs. 

Prior to the wedding a photographer may have you fill out a questionnaire to get a better sense of the flow of your wedding day and expectations on what is to be photographed.  A good photographer should discuss what you envision for the day and try to identify the most important details to capture.  While some items may seem like common sense to include, it is far better to remind your photographer of critical photographs to take rather than find out after the wedding that the photographs were not shot. The walk-through of your vision is the perfect opportunity to include a list of critical Jewish customs expected to occur throughout the day. 

The following table provides a list of some items that will help tell your Jewish Wedding Day story:

 

Lastly, enjoy being photographed and have some FUN!  The best pictures can be when you are in a most spontaneous moment.

The McConaughey Wedding: Camila Goes Modest

 Camila Alves and Matthew McConaughey exchanged "I Do's" only a few days ago, and it was a pleasant surprise to see the beautiful Brazilian-born Camila sporting a modest long-sleeved lace wedding gown designed by Ducarmo Catelo Branco.  She might have spent a pretty penny for her customized gown, but you don't have to spend a lot to get the look.  Since it is more common to find wedding gowns without sleeves, one of the more affordable options is to "build up" the dress from an otherwise non-modest gown.

Here are some things to consider if you decide to build up your gown:

• Pro's: You can feel free to shop at any secular bridal store and fall in love with almost any style, which includes designer wedding dresses at sample sale prices (the price for a couture secular dress plus the cost of a build up can be significantly lower than a couture modest dress without the build-up). NY Magazine has provided a Summer 2010 bridal gown directory of stores: http://nymag.com/weddings/listings/gowns/  
• Con's: The time spent on going to several fittings, and the money spent for the build-up can be excruciating. If you do not hire a seamstress or designer with experience in making build-ups then you are taking a huge risk. Even if you do hire the right seamstress, you must still know some of the terminology used in designing the build-up. Further, the final product of having a build-up added to the wedding gown may not provide the ultimate desired look, and the material used may be uncomfortable.
• Resources: For my wedding, I found the perfect Kleinfeld sample sale designer dress that needed a build-up, which deserves a separate blog (it is no wonder that Kleinfeld’s has a TV Show on buying a wedding gown with the kind of drama that can happen there). The biggest tip I can offer is to go to a highly recommended tailor that will provide solid guidance and experience to ensure the build-up looks natural, comfortable, and enhances the look of the original wedding gown. I recommend Designer Loft: http://www.designerloftnyc.com/  
• They are a bit pricey, but the seamstresses are supervised by a designer that offers quality advice on ensuring a successful build-up.

Get inspired by Camila's look and check out Brides.com's recently published slideshow of similar modest wedding dresses by other designers.  Here are some favorites:

The Custom of Breaking Glass Under the Chuppah

Why is there a custom of breaking glass under the chuppah at a Jewish Wedding?

The quick answer is that the breaking of glass commemorates the destruction of the Temple / Bet Hamikdash.  The tradition is for the groom to break glass by stomping on it with his foot, and this happens upon the completion of the seven blessings / sheva brachot that are recited under the chuppah.  The glass is typically some sort of whole glass object such as a glass cup, but it is also typical to use a light bulb since it is made of glass and can easily be broken when stepped on.  The glass object is wrapped in cloth or paper and placed on the ground near the groom.  The groom steps on the glass until it is broken and this concludes the chuppah ceremony.

It seems ironic to leave the chuppah, the place where two souls are united as one, with the sound of broken glass and the shattering of something that was once whole into lots of tiny sharp pieces.  But just like glass, marriage is fragile and can shatter.  The chuppah is a place to recognize G-d's presence both in our union as husband and wife and in the covenant between G-d and the Jewish people.  This spiritual connection provides strength for us, even in our most fragile moments and when things could shatter.

An interesting way to capture the moment is to save the broken pieces of glass and then have them "frozen" in a Lucite cube as a keepsake.  Here's a picture of a Rectangular Wedding Glass Lucite Cube by Treasured Collection:

Feel free to add comments or questions about this post.

Looking for Stylish Modest Wedding Gowns?

Well hello J.Crew!  J.Crew's 2012 wedding collection is offering up two stylish modest wedding gowns that require few alterations.  Are wedding gowns with long-sleeves finally making a come back?  You tell me...

New York Weddings Event

New York Weddings magazine is throwing an event that will be sure to inspire any bride's wedding vision...and tickets are affordable (online tickets are only $40 for 1 ticket or $60 for 2 tickets).  If you're looking for fresh wedding ideas, access to top wedding vendors, or you'd like any particular wedding questions answered, I highly recommend attending this event.
When:  March 28th, 2012 5-8pm
Where:  Metropolitan Pavilion (125 West 18th Street, NYC)
Cost: online tickets are $40 for 1 ticket or $60 for 2 tickets

Buy tickets before they're sold out!

More Stylish Modest Bridesmaid’s Dresses

Bloomingdale's latest wedding lookbook offers up some stylish modest bridal dresses.  And for those winter brides out there, check out the faux fur wrap... a great solution to making your wedding dress more modest!